VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Randomize
