Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
