You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
