big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
