It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize