just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize
