yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize