Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Your penis caused this!
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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