even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Randomize
