Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
