We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
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