who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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