we have officially lost it.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
they need to just BURY HIM!
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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