Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
