what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I look excited, but its just a facade.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
