Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
She even gives head with a lisp.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
