PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
