i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
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