There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize