oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
