so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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