I'm laying in your front yard are you home
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
