Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Randomize
