How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
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