Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Randomize
