I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Randomize