when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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