did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
