Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
