Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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