He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Randomize