last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Randomize
