Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
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