these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
