I forgot how hot balto sounded
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
