Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
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