If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
