if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
