You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Randomize
