He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
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