His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
