My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
