she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
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