And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
