Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
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