Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
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