Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize
