I need help removing her.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
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