tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize