i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
