sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Randomize
