The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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